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Post by brotherray on Oct 24, 2011 6:03:42 GMT -5
I'm embarassed. 1st attempt with DOP. --------
pocketbook governess returned back to fiction World's problems were tough She shrugged it off black formed white evaporated tie a boy to a lion pushed over edge children open eyes star over heads
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Post by Astarael ~ Enduring on Oct 24, 2011 6:13:36 GMT -5
welcome to the Drops board, thanks for being brave and posting it I really like it, that opening was really cool and such an interesting combination very much enjoyed this.
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Post by brotherray on Oct 24, 2011 8:03:56 GMT -5
Thanks. As I read it to myself for the first time, I started hearing that computer voice from the Radiohead album OK Computer ("FITTER...HAPPIER...MORE PRODUCTIVE...ah, it's turgid. Classic album, though). That's why I had my doubts.
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Post by shiz♥k3sa on Nov 2, 2011 7:05:29 GMT -5
that first line is so great. well done on your drops. I have yet to try it out.
~shiz
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Post by ॐ Hemz ॐ on Nov 7, 2011 14:15:12 GMT -5
There is freedom in knowing there are restrictions. That is what makes Drops all the more fun and a creative challenge. The poem is really nifty and going from pocketbooks to black then white, I suddenly made a connection by association to stars above at night almost as if words were creating pictures literally. Keep writing.
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