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Post by darkwoods on Jul 24, 2006 23:06:08 GMT -5
a thick copper liquid fills my mouth for I scarcely want to swallow and feel it ooze down my throat in all its repulsive splender instead I spit it out and watch sickened as blood slides toward the drain then I stand there waiting for it to happen once again the grotesque cycle never ending or so it always seems
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Post by lifeart on Jul 25, 2006 14:05:00 GMT -5
great imagery! great choice of words and beautiful poem!
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Post by Romantics on Jul 25, 2006 14:34:51 GMT -5
yukky yukky yukky.
reminds me of my dad standing in front of me in my kitchen when i was very young and screaming at me to swallow a cod liver oil tablet.
I cried for hours and still he shouted.
I can just about swallow 10 mg tablets now lol
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Post by - Moirae - on Jul 25, 2006 15:47:36 GMT -5
i felt your pain with this one..*shudders*
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Post by *Whisper* on Jul 25, 2006 19:31:44 GMT -5
Oooh. Great language choice and imagery!
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Post by darkwoods on Jul 26, 2006 15:20:55 GMT -5
thanks
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Post by ॐ Hemz ॐ on Oct 17, 2006 7:39:39 GMT -5
Terrific flow and yes, your choice of words is fantastic.
Best, ~Hem~
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Arinna
Wandering Muse
Teach us to care and not to care
Posts: 93
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Post by Arinna on Oct 26, 2006 3:17:17 GMT -5
Wonderful (if slightly gruesome) imagary.
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