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Post by MidnightInEden on Mar 26, 2008 5:00:23 GMT -5
Sweet and simple - I liked the disconnected feel of this, like you were 'dropping' each line down carefully to add to the image. Well done Dan
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Post by MidnightInEden on Mar 26, 2008 5:04:14 GMT -5
I like this... it's interesting how the punctuation really worked to 'explain' the phrasing. A very ethereal image overall, nicely done Violist.
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Post by MidnightInEden on Jan 27, 2008 22:33:28 GMT -5
The tenses are a little awkward but the imagery is stark and intriguing. I really liked the second stanza, it was a beautiful culmination.
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Post by MidnightInEden on Jan 27, 2008 22:29:02 GMT -5
A lovely haiku, I like the image you've created out of such simplistic language. I can just feel the thrumming of the "silver beast" and its engine. Kudos
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