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Post by ElijahsGreyPanthers on Jul 29, 2009 21:17:34 GMT -5
Vintage ideology discourages my desire, daytime concealed above black stretches. Promising it is heaven, when it is an opposite to dawn. Inertia made their device migrate, rotted method copying hypothetical context. Vulnerability obscuring the outlook, stretching spiritual disputes in marks. Compresses desires and dodges regret, A fakes' college skirting the edge of the kettle.
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Post by bobswife4ever (surgery soon) on Aug 1, 2009 12:03:45 GMT -5
The ending line threw me off a bit, but I must say, this is an incredible drops poem. I loved it and I loved how easy it flowed as I was reading it. Nicely done. ***ApPlAuSe***
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Post by ~NevermoreIcon~ on Aug 3, 2009 11:45:18 GMT -5
okay I must exalt this and there a few reasons I must do so.. this was a very intelligent write for one thing.. and the fact that the title of my last post here is within two lines of each other really "rings out" to me.. so with power such as that.. all there is left to say is EXALT!! well done
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Post by Lady Whight - member of STUPID on Aug 23, 2009 18:43:42 GMT -5
Hehe, I can relate! 'Vintage ideologies' abound indeed and method presides over originality more often than not. You also imitated the language used in academia wonderfully. Exalting you for this as well.
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chizl
Wandering Muse
Posts: 90
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Post by chizl on Sept 7, 2009 23:56:51 GMT -5
Loved this! "Vulnerability obscuring the outlook". Nicely done.
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Post by asher02 on Sept 10, 2009 17:53:17 GMT -5
Brilliant. Put together very well. I love the line "Compresses desires and dodges regret"
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Post by needleme on Oct 1, 2009 11:34:44 GMT -5
I found the first four lines to be quite a tale, almost sorrowful, like a person with dementia realizing things arent as they seem and becoming discouraged by it. Within the limits of a drops poem, I think you did rather well.
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anya
Established Muse
Posts: 214
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Post by anya on Oct 10, 2009 5:05:37 GMT -5
"Promising it is heaven, when it is an opposite to dawn." reminds me of our local priests. anyway, really liked this one.! very nicely done to think that this poem of yours was written from a group of words that don't have that direct connection with each other. ahehe.
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