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Post by tanithmora on Sept 12, 2010 17:28:13 GMT -5
Planetary audience rages in alien horror, can't roll down a pocket void. Doubting it is air beneath my brick, then how is art stolen longest? Hope revised the faithful memory, after it listened when flute vessels circled widest.
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Post by bcoyotey on Sept 18, 2010 1:34:10 GMT -5
when flute vessels circled widest.
That line held me captive. It conjures a vivid imagery of longing. A memory or moment that cannot (for some reason) ever be re-captured fully, but is replayed many times over in the imagination. Very personable feel. Great writing. Lady B
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Post by (k) shades of silence on Sept 20, 2010 2:49:00 GMT -5
You have taken a limited vocabulary and really made something special out of it. I love how you use big concepts (alien horror) juxtaposed against tiny ones (air under a brick). Bravo, my friend. Bravo.
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Post by girlwiththepearls on Sept 24, 2010 17:21:59 GMT -5
I agree that this is a very captivating piece, and oddly vivid despite (or because of?) the idiosyncratic word choices. I loved "doubting it is air beneath my brick"--wholly unique yet the sentiment is easily recognized. Lovely work.
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